Ideas that would be fascinating to market, and implausible to invent. They may change your life, though.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Pub Navigation

Problem: every pub has a different layout, and sometimes it takes a bit of time to work out where the bar is, where the toilet is, and how to get out. All of this is exacerbated by being drunk. For the average drinking person, it would be desirable to be able to get some help with finding the place to buy the next drink, the pocket with the money in, the toilet to use to wee it out, the door to get out of the place at closing time, and the way home when you're too drunk to even remember how to get a taxi.

The Solution: a small handheld device for drunk people with three functions: drink, wee and home. This device will use GPS technology to assist the drunk and will simply point in the direction to face before the drunkard then simply puts one foot in front of another in a deliberate fashion to get there. If the person forgets how to walk, the device will explain that too, with a reassuring voice saying things like "You can do it" and "I love you, mate". This will be the absolute assistance for getting around the place for drunk people and will be called the "Sot Nav".

Prognosis: people like gadgets and they like to get drunk. This can be put for sale in Argos as a slightly reduced price and can come with upgrades like "How to find the pub", "How to apologise to the wife", "Where the nearest kebab shop is" and "Which way is up when I've fallen over".

Marketing Statement
Sot-Nav will be the new sweaty-palm-top choice for drunks everywhere. Give it a shot.


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